Monday, 27 June 2011

The Day I Lost My Son To The Devils..english version


It was on the night of the 5th of September, 2009.

It rained the whole night. At 4am I woke up to prepare sahur and prayers. I was putting food on the table when my son came in.

He was drenched from head to toe. It was not wrong to guess that he just came in from outside. I could still hear the pelting of raindrops outside. He stood still in the middle of the kitchen, oblivious of my presence, water draining from his head and clothings, wetting the kitchen floor.

‘Kenapa pulak dengan anakku ni!’, I thought.(What's going on?)

‘My son, are you out of your mind? Did you spend the night in the rain?’, I asked casually.

That casuality was just a make-up. Deep inside my heart, I was scared to death.

 ‘What if it is true? That he really spent the night outside. That he’s being possessed and gone crazy?!!

 Mum’s instinct can be scary.

Because a few weeks before, he told us, he dreamt of being trampled by a few black horses every night. 

Many days after that, three big boils suddenly appeared, causing a big bulge on his hand. But strangely, they disappeared clean-cut, not even a dot of scar remained, when his elder sister stroked the affected part with the Quranic verse, Ayatul Kursi.

Two days after that, when his elder sister woke him up for sahur, she discovered a jellish big lump on his back. When she stroked the lump gently, it moved about. Without much thought, she read the quranic verse, ayatul Kursi.

 The lump immediately rushed through her palms into her body. So, there was no more lump left on my son’s back.

But he could not wake up. A few days after that, he slept most of the time. We thought it was because he was fasting. A week after that, the above incident happenned…

He did not respond to my questions. That wasn’t like him.

 He was always cheerful and jovial, always ‘pulling our legs’, ‘stressing’ us with his mind-twisting riddles. He always made his presence felt.

Suddenly he opened his mouth wide, trying to push something out of his tummy, trying to throw out something. He did that twice. Nothing came out.

I scrutinised his face, calling his name. He just stood there, his face blank, pale, expressionless, in a trance.

 I shook his shoulders and called his name. He did not respond. His body was shaking, from the cold, maybe…

.." What now? What shall i do now? I cannot think...i have no knowledge whatsoever to handle this kind of 'thing'. What to come next will be beyond my capability. 

I have to surrender. I know truly well the repercussions. I have seen these things happen before, to other people. Never for once did I imagine it will happen to me! To my own son! "

Now, my turn to tremble, out of fear, panic, apprehension… Whatever.. My adrenalin is in charge now.

‘Be Cool , just be cool , if you Iose your mind, you’ll make the situation even worse. You’ll gain nothing’, I told myself.

So, I whispered special Quranic verses.. ayatul Kursi, into his ears. He started moving away, avoiding me. I tailed him. He stopped. Then he spoke...

 ’stop that!’

What on earth!!! Who’s speaking?? 

My son’s face was as expressionless as before...certainly it wasn't him..
I was really really scared !

I must fight this ‘thing’, I thought.

I stopped whispering into his ears. I read ayatul Kursi in my heart and blew gently behind his back. He swept his back with his hand. I read again but this time I ‘niat’ the ayatul Kursi for him.

Then he turned around and told me..

 ‘Don’t do that!’

So I asked, ‘don’t do what?’

He ignored my question. I recited ayatul Kursi in my heart again. He turned around again and told me..

 ‘Don’t do that’.

Then I called his name ..over and over again.

‘Wake up, my son! Wake up! Fight this thing! Fight the devils! You can do it.’

I held his shoulders, shook them. He brushed my hands away. I could not touch him anymore after that..

From that day, we lost him. He stayed with us but his heart and mind was elsewhere…we could not reach him..He is so far faraway..
So near and yet so far.

Dear Allah..where is my sweet little Hadi ? We miss him..really miss him..

Today, I could still recall his strange plea when he was only 3-4 years old...Whenever I put him on the shopping trolley, he reminded me..

 Mak, jangan bagi orang ambik Hadi, tau mak,

(Mum, don't let anybody take me away..make sure !! )

..repeating the syllables everytime I placed him on a shopping trolley or on his stroller.

That time, I wondered, how a young child, a baby in fact, who should be running here and there, could have such sophisticated thoughts...such insight..

And now the reality is, I could save him from orang’ (people) but I don’t have the knowledge and skill to save him from the devils...

Saudara–saudari yang saya kasihi,

Teringat zaman kanak-kanak dahulu, apabila adanya musibah menimpa satu-satu keluarga, seluruh ahli qariah/ kampung, akan berkumpul di rumah tu selepas solat isya’, ramai-ramai membaca surah Yasin, mohon pertolongan Allah. Imam dan penghulu kampung berperanan memimpin jamaah kampung. Terasa kebahagiaan dan kesatuan. Tak payah pasang bunting ‘WE CARE’. Everything free-of-charge. Ibu-ibu secara automatic akan rancangkan dan masakkan makanan untuk semua.

Sekarang ni, budaya sebegini dah hampir luput. Kesatuan dan persaudaraan terpaksa dicanang dan diiklan, dengan harga pulak tu. Dalam perkataan moden, diPUBLICISE.
Anak-anak kita di bandar langsung tak kenal budaya ini.

Saudara-saudari yang dikasihi,

Membaca surah Yasin beramai-ramai, mohon hajat dan doa bukan kecil fadhilatnya. Ulama’-ulama’ syifa’ mengguna kaedah ini. Saya teringat masa di sekolah rendah dahulu, ustazah menceritakan tentang hadith Rasulullah saw tentang doa yang Allah akan maqbulkan apabila 40 orang yang mohon adalah orang-orang soleh. Tak tau la betul ke tidak ustazah ni.

Saudara-saudari yang saya kasihi,

Alangkah indahnya jika budaya ini hidup kembali. Ramai ahli kita ditimpa musibah, yang famous pun ada. Nikmatilah sendiri kedamaian dan kasih sayang yang bakal kita perolehi. Lihat sendiri kesuburan persaudaraan dan kegemilangannya.

A BROTHER IN NEED IS A BROTHER INDEED. He needs your company to be with Allah.
Barakallahu fiikum wassalaamu alaikum warahmatullahi wabaarakatuh

POSTED IN PerutusanTinta KW

klik..original permataku

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